Nice Guy Mistakes Men Make With Women – Putting the Girl on a Pedestal

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So you really really like a girl… and you spend all day fantasizing about her… and scheming of ways to make her like you… because you want to make her all YOURS.

If this is you, keep reading, because I’m going to talk about a subtle, but huge mistake you might be making with your crush.

The mistake is called SUPPLICATION.

If a girl suddenly lost interest in you and you’re not sure why… chances are, you were supplicating to her.

Now you gotta be careful because this is a trap that you fall into without noticing.

What is Supplication?

Ever heard of the saying “don’t put the girl on the pedestal”?

When you put a woman on the pedestal, you supplicate to her. You give your power away and treat her like she’s above you.

Now the thing is… you can be supplicating in a very SUBTLE way without realizing it.

I’ll give you one example:

My friend Bobby once dated a girl who was into hip hop.

Now he was into rock and she didn’t like rock, she was into hip hop.

So they’d get in the car and she’d always change the station to the hip hop station.

And he immediately thinks “I don’t want to listen to this.”

…but in his mind, she was more important than he was.

The fact that she was enjoying the music was more important than what Bobby enjoyed.

That’s what happens with guys who supplicate to women without even knowing they’re doing it. They deep down unconsciously feel that the girl is MORE IMPORTANT THAN THEM.

Here’s what to do instead: Put yourself on equal footing with her.

See a lot of guys go to one of the two extremes:

1. They become either the supplicating nice guy… or

2. They become the combative jerkoff who feels like they have to say no to everything and never pay for a drink and go around slamming doors on girls’ faces.

Instead, understand what supplication is so you can AVOID it… and make sure that when you do something nice for a girl, the girl also reciprocates.

Let’s repeat that one more time because it’s important…

When you do something nice for a girl, make sure it’s reciprocated.

For example, when a girl asks you to buy her a drink… should you buy her a drink in a bar?

This is a question that gets asked all the time.

And there are two extremes here…

Extreme 1: The Nice Guy

One is when the girl goes “will you buy me a drink” and the guy eagerly pulls out his wallet to buy her a drink even if he hasn’t talked to her that much.

Extreme 2: The Jaded Former Nice Guy

Then there’s the other extreme of the guy who hears “don’t buy women drinks”… and he’s like “NO, I don’t buy drinks for girls”…

But this makes you look cheap… and the girl who might have been into you now thinks “what’s the deal with this dude?”

How to handle this? Very simple.

Remember: You and her are on the same exact level. That’s the way we are treating it.

If a girl says “can you buy me a drink?”… say “sure I’ll get you a drink. Here’s what you’ll do, go get us a couple tables and we will sit and talk”.

You just make her do something so that she also contributes!

But see, a lot of guys want to please the woman without her doing anything.

I was at a BBQ the other day. Some girl walks over to a guy and she hands him her empty cup, and she’s like “go get me a sangria, go fill up my cup”…

…And he wasn’t her boyfriend, he wasn’t even some guy she was banging. He was just some guy at the party who was really eager to do this favor for her.

The thing now, is that he thinks in his mind “yeah! I got some points with her” …but I was like yeah “you just totally showed her that she can make you do shit and make you her bitch”.

Girls test you. They want to see what they can make you do.

We’ve all been there though. At some point or another, we were that guy getting the sangria cup.

My friend Bobby tells the story of how one time in college, some girl he liked wanted to buy a term paper, and the place they sold the term paper was at the bad part of town. So Bobby was like “I’ll drive you!” So he drove her there… he had to pay gas for his car… and he even lent the girl money.

He was doing all this stuff for her thinking that she’s going to think “wow he’s a good guy.”

However, that is a nice guy mistake! And that girl never showed him anymore interest.

Again, it isn’t even about being “nice”… it’s about putting just as much value on yourself as you do on the woman… not putting MORE value on her.

Remember this in your future interactions.

Because just being “nice” for free works against you.

You gotta let them invest and contribute as well.